Being My Own Worst Enemy

Throughout the years I have been struggling with my self-esteem. From the outside people would probably say for the most part that I look like an asshole or a person who full of himself. The funny thing is that I am the total opposite of that. For the people who know me well knows that I don't have that much confidence, yet I surprise myself with some of the things I accomplished. I mean, there are certain things in life that I know I'm confident about such as, networking, marketing, acting, getting a job, and stuff like that. My biggest battle is women....yea I said it women. There is something wrong with me when it comes to women. Its a crazy combination of being oblivious, nervous, insecure, pensive, and down right no guts. I would reject myself, before I could even think about engaging in a conversation. I would say things like "Nah she wasn't looking a me", "Man you gotta be in the NFL to talk to her", "You gotta be rich", "I bet she date model looking dudes", and the list goes on...lol... I know none of us on the face of this planet is perfect, but I put myself so down, that I can't pick myself back up. My closest friends and family hates it when I down play myself, but I can't help it now...If you are a guy reading this you are not alone...and if you are a woman reading this I hope this showed you that men have feelings too.